Day 15

Lots of discoveries from Day 15 at the Book Festival.

Look! There on the left! It's Horace the Haggis. He's from Sally Magnusson's children's book, and he's been wandering happily around the Book Festival today with great aplomb. Black & White Publishing have put together an enjoyable little collage of Horace's day out in Charlotte Square Gardens.

As Chris Hoy is normally a blur, it's difficult to hold him still and check if it's really him, but – yes – it's been confirmed – that was the Olympic champion himself visiting the Book Festival. He was watching his great uncle Andy Coogan's (left) event this evening.

Jeremy Paxman confesses he couldn't dance to save his life. Not that he was expected to dance in his event today. But he did mention he was once out with some Anglo-Indian people who were doing the jive (as in the ballroom dance style), and when complimented they said sincerely that they “got their natural rhythm from the British”. The audience laughed for about five minutes when Paxman told us this.

You've seen – or at least heard of – the Lewis Chessmen, but have you noticed how utterly despondent they look? 'Horrid Henry' author Francesca Simon has, and today she shared her theory as to why they are so gloomy. They're real people, frozen and shrunk. You'd be at least a little bit frowny if that happened to you.

Censorship has been a sizzling hot topic at the Book Festival this year, and this morning Poet Laureate Carol Ann Duffy reminded us that she herself was censored by Britain's biggest exam board back when (as she puts it) “Meryl Streep was Prime Minister”. Carol Ann Duffy's 'Education for Leisure' was thought to be a potential provoker of knife crime in schools.

I don't know about you, but I kind of like the idea of some knife-wielding teenage hoodlum being influenced by a poem.

The other day, Nile Rodgers persuasively re-branded the Book Festival “The World, In Words (& Music)”. From the talented trills of M J McCarthy, to the veritably touching song of Michael Morpurgo (left), to the eclectic mix of musicians that have performed at Unbound over the last couple of weeks, the Book Festival has enjoyed a truly successful soundtrack this year. And it's wonderful what music can do. Just today, woodwind musician John Sampson had a packed audience bent double with laughter, and he didn't have to say a word.

Oh go on then. Let's admit it. Let's admit it so we can embrace it. It's been raining – a lot. The humming of rain on the tents, the whisper of drizzle on the green grass – it's all been damply atmospheric. And what do Book Festival fans do in the rain? We sip hot coffee in the Signing Tent, stretch out in the Bookshop – oh, and laze around on the deckchairs in the rain, of course. Preferably with an ice cream.

Day 14 and a half

Here are a few recommendations for the next (and final!) few days of the Book Festival.

Tonight (Saturday 25th)

Jasper Fforde

Have you read 'The Woman Who Died a Lot'? Jasper Fforde has, because he wrote it. And as you can tell by the title, this is a writer full of humour and intrigue and brilliantly unexpected quirks. But you already know that. Come to his event at 8.30PM in the ScottishPower Studio Theatre this evening and you'll know it even more.

Will Self

Tonight at 9.30PM in the the RBS Main Theatre, the prince of pronunciation himself will be talking about his new novel 'Umbrella' and the implications therein. If you're not going to this event, go and sit in the corner and have a long hard think about your life. And then go to the event.

Tomorrow (Sunday 26th)

Susannah Clapp

There has been a fair bit of buzz on Twitter about this event, so I'll say it again: Susannah Clapp's event at 3.30PM in the ScottishPower Studio Theatre looks to be very interesting indeed. And not only that, but moving. Susannah will be discussing her novel about the great Angela Carter, with whom she was close friends.

Mark Billingham

He was a stand-up comedian, and now he writes crime fiction. That's what we at the Book Festival call a very, very, very promising event. He's on at 4.30PM in the RBS Main Theatre. Prepare to make all manner of intrigued noises.

The day after tomorrow (Monday 27th)

Deborah Levy & Gwendoline Riley

A powerful, likeable author with a remarkable novel. And there's two of them. In the same room. At the same time. To take full advantage of this fact, see you at 10.15AM in the famously atmospheric Guardian Spiegeltent.

 

Peter Robinson

A crime writer with intelligence, with passion, and with a brilliant character that's really getting people talking. This character, DCI Banks, recently starred in a four-part series on ITV, and is now back in book form with a vengeance. 7PM in the ScottishPower Studio Theatre.

Day 14

Today's discoveries!

Today I met a lady who'd visited the Book Festival annually for thirteen years! I also met a 12-year-old boy who'd been to the Book Festival every year of his entire life. A born fan, then. Both attest that it gets better by the year. They'd know.

In an event this afternoon, chair Rodge Glass was schooled by (a beautifully playful) Howard Jacobson on what authors he's allowed to say he enjoys. And the rule, apparently, is this: if you're chairing an event at the Book Festival, you are permitted only to adore the books of the author you're interviewing, and no other. Unless the other authors you're referring to are dead. That's allowed.

Time for quite an immature discovery. You may have seen the “Hopes of a Nation” board in the children's bookshop. It's full of sweet and inspiring thoughts from the kids that contribute to it. But take that same insightful child and put it with a group of its schoolmates, and what do you get? “Books are gay”. Ahh, hopes of a nation indeed!

Our Book Festival authors have some enjoyably unexpected backgrounds, and the list grows day by day. Politicians, artists, priests, police officers, chefs, film-makers, teachers, scientists, athletes, an Islamic fundamentalist, and the Prime Minister of Great Britain. See if you can guess who's who.

Howard Jacobson today spoke of a bittersweet honour. His work is packed with references to how the novel is failing and how literature is under-appreciated.

Unfortunately, in 2010 'The Finkler Question' won the Man Booker prize.

This ruined his point completely.

Day 13

First, a couple of discoveries.

When the bookshop staff came into the signing tent, they found that the Ian McEwan books – ready for his events today and yesterday – had mysteriously arranged themselves into artful stacks. Further investigation confirmed that this was the work of the warehouse staff, who delivered the books to the signing tent and happened to be in a particularly arty mood.

Mark Haddon, author of 'The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time', confessed today that he believes himself to be a fairly poor writer by nature. He says his first drafts are awful. What he is, however, is a very good “editor”. It takes him endless drafts to reach the glowing quality we enjoy in his books. He explains that the process is like combing a very dirty Afghan Hound. It starts off a mess, but gradually gets smoother and tidier and more beautiful until it's quite pristine.

Recently I got my hands on four tickets to Susannah Clapp at the Book Festival, so I can brandish them gleefully as a prize to the winner of... a Book Festival caption competition!

There are so many impressed “hmm!” noises at Chris Close's portraits around Charlotte Square Gardens that it's like having a bee stuck in your ear. Today I picked out one of my favourites, and am opening it your captions. Tomorrow, Chris himself will help me pick the winner.

Susannah Clapp's event is this Sunday the 26^th at 3.30PM. She has penned a remarkable book on the late Angela Carter, one of the most influential artists of the last fifty years. Susannah will be discussing her book and her moving, fascinating meetings with Carter.

As if that wasn't a tempting enough prize, the event is sponsored by the Folio Society, a company renowned for its beautiful and creative cover designs. And for its generosity, which means – yes that's right – goody bags. Expect free book vouchers and other such treats.

So, on with the picture!

This is Chris' photograph of Professors Frank Close and Peter Higgs (as in Higgs boson).

You can contribute your captions on Twitter (with hashtag #edbookfestcomp) or here in the comments section. If you do use the comments section, please leave your full name or/and email address.

This competition will close at 12 noon tomorrow (Friday)!

Good luck!

Day 12

My discoveries for the day...

The last time Adam Thorpe was in the Spiegeltent he was doing an event with Hilary Mantel (left), who was writing 'Wolf Hall' at the time. Adam asked her what she was working on, and she said it was a novel about Thomas Cromwell. “Oh”, Adam remembers saying sarcastically; “that'll go down well”.

The rest is history.

Given that Charlotte Square Gardens is slap bang in the middle of Scotland's capital city (which, in turn, is slap bang in the middle of festival season), noise from the outside world sometimes slips into the ambiance of the theatres. But this has always been dealt with to great effect in the events I've been to. Danny Wallace said of the rainstorm - “I have angered Thor”. Adam Thorpe said of the sirens - “I specifically asked for these sound effects”. When a plane flew very low over the Gardens, Stuart Kelly remarked - “you'll always remember you were at the Book Festival the day war broke out”. And, the other day, when a group of girls were heard squealing outside the Main Theatre, an audience member leaned over and said to me “crikey, you'd think Jacqueline Wilson was out there or something”. Sure enough, when I went outside, there was Jacqueline Wilson herself, talking animatedly to a group of eager fans. What a lucky guess.

Claire Kilroy's gothic novel, 'The Devil I Know', was not supposed to be gothic. But while she was writing it, the Irish economic situation was dominating the news, which she heard through the radio. “ATMs will freeze, hospitals will close. Go buy some tin peaches because it might be the last meal you have in a while”. And, before she knew it, her writing was reflecting that looming asperity.

Each day at the Book Festival has been jam-packed with authors performing readings of their work, be them funny, moving, haunting, inspiring, or all of the above. But next time you hear a reading, make sure you bring the original text along... because Karen Campbell has confessed to occasionally self-editing as she reads out her work to an audience! I wonder if any other Book Festival authors do this. Let's keep a very sharp eye out. And if you catch someone doing it, heckle! Loudly.

(Don't.)

(I said don't!)

Day 11 and a half

Not sure what events to go to? Here are some recommendations for the next few days. 

This evening (Wednesday 22nd)

Shaun Tan

This is a unique chance to hear from an eclectic Book Festival author, artist and film-maker. In 2011 he won Sweden's Astrid Lindgren Memorial Award and an Academy Award. This year he's sharing his experiences and inspirations with a lucky Book Festival audience. He's on at 5PM in the ScottishPower Studio Theatre.

Iain Banks

The idea that I actually need to say anything persuasive about this fellow is a bit silly. So I'll just say his name. Iain Banks. Iain Banks will be here. 8PM in the RBS Main Theatre.

Tomorrow (Thursday 23rd)

Paul Broda

There's a whole host of great events on Thursday, and this one is right up there. Professor Paul Broda (left) will be speaking with Tam Dalyell about some astonishing political truths. Paul Broda's stepfather was Alan Nunn May - a Soviet spy. Hear about the history and resonance of this at 5PM in the ScottishPower Studio Theatre.

Kate Summerscale

Sex, secrets and dangerous whims - the incredibly successful writer of 'The Suspicions of Mr Whicher' has penned a new Victorian scandal to match it. Join her at 11.30AM in the RBS Main Theatre. The tickets are hot, so don't burn your fingers.

The day after tomorrow (Friday 24th)

Carol Ann Duffy

As recommended events go, I'm recommending this one fiercely. I might tantrum if you don't go. Carol Ann Duffy is - obviously - Poet Laureate. She will be joined not only by her fervent talent, but by musician John Sampson. This unmissable event is on at 4.30PM in the RBS Main Theatre.

The Brain of James Carter

This children's event on Friday afternoon sounds fantastic. The Book Festival can offer young 'uns a peek inside James Carter's brain - and it's a brain full of bewitching imagination and wild poetry. Ideal for kids aged 6 to 10. Join us at 1.30PM in the RBS Imagination Lab. And you may want to take the name of the venue, "Imagination Lab", literally.

Day 11

Discoveries aplenty! Let us delve into them. Starting with my favourite...

Reports of strange Book Festival related dreams have been cropping up all over the place. We know that Chika Unigwe had a dream before the Writers' Conference that Woody Allen came to tell her that all writers were rule-breakers, but you probably didn't know that at least two audience members have dreamed that the Gruffalo is the secret brains behind the Book Festival.

Additionally, one staff member had a dream that the entire front row of seats in the Main Theatre had been put in the wrong way round, and I myself had a dream that the Front of House staff had been called up to be told about someone's disability requirement, which was that they were lonely and needed a hug before each event. Someone also mentioned that they fell asleep in Charlotte Square Gardens and was allegedly woken up by Vimes from Terry Pratchett's 'Discworld'. Were they sure that was a dream? You never know with the Book Festival.

Rubbing shoulders with your heroes at the front of a signing queue is a real highlight for many Book Festival visitors – and it can make your career. Once upon a time, theatre director David Johnstone was queuing to have his book signed by Ben Okri (left). David mentioned that he was a director, and Ben scribbled his phone number beneath his autograph. Now David is directing the theatre adaption of Ben Okri's 'The Comic Destiny'.

Today in his event, Antony Beevor said: “'I'm convinced the US was right to drop the atomic bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki”. A juicily controversial assertion! When taken out of context. So I asked Antony to contextualise it, and he kindly agreed, explaining that without the bombings significantly more causalities would have been caused by war and starvation in Japan.

John Burnside has written and spoken about wind turbines and their effects, and, as someone who knows a great deal about them, he adds his knowledge to the relevant Wikipedia pages – only for his edits to be immediately removed by the organisations that own the turbines.

Official yurt doodler Mo bagged her first posed Book Festival models. She usually goes for candid sketches, but today both China Miéville and Ewan Morrison (left) sat for her. And they didn't wriggle.

Speaking of China and Ewan, the last of the Book Festival's Writers' Conferences was today. It was about the future of the novel, and sparked as much passion as the Conference did on previous days. (And you can re-live those days on the Writers' Conference website.)

While the Writers' Conference as a quintet of events provoked mostly agreement, a remark that came up time and time again was that rarely were any clear conclusions made. But the idea of concluding any discussion on the very free and very profound topic of literature is a distressing one.

If you love to debate (or, as your friends and family call it, “bicker”), you'll know that the very act of debate is intrinsically satisfying, and is not a means to an end at all. I fear the people who crave full stops and neatly-tied loose ends for the Writers' Conference are very sensible and tidy people. And none of my favourite writers are sensible or tidy.

If the Writers' Conference has left you utterly buzzing, but without a sense of resolution, then I believe it has done its job beautifully.

Most of the feedback on the Writers' Conference was as erudite as the writers themselves, but in my opinion the most expressive and telling feedback was the far less articulate stuff to be overheard while leaving the Writers' Conference.

At one point I heard: “Jackie Kay is so completely... she's just so completely... you know?” and “Ben Okri has this way of speaking, it's just... actually, I don't know what it is... but wow...” and “Ewan Morrison does this amazing thing when he makes a point; he sort of... he just... he kind of just...” and “how does China Miéville actually be like that? I can't even... I can't begin to...” and “Chika Unigwe, she's just so... so... she's just so...”

I know exactly what they mean.